I feel better today! I ate really well yesterday and consumed roughly 2,000 calories - Healthy calories that were not filled with cheese and oil and all the tasty things the world has to offer. Last night KSTS, Daisy Marie (my niece) and I played some tennis then we went to a track and I jogged/ran/walked (only a little walking) - Then dinner consisted of whole wheat pasta, prego spaghetti sauce, and some Gimmie Lean Soy Sausage! It actually tasted pretty good! The texture of the sausage was a little off, but the flavor was there! And the whole dinner was only 580 calories! Score! So after a day of working hard and eating right I feel better - not great, not as good as I did back on my birthday (I was like 312 that day) - BUT I will get back there and surpass that mark quite soon! I got to! My close are not currently fitting!

For breakfast I just had some oatmeal and a bagel thin and some ham. For lunch: soup, granola bars, and pretzel chips. For snacks: almonds and granola bar. For dinner: not sure yet??? But it will NOT be Dirty Don's or L&L cafe or anything else like that! It WILL either be eating at home (my preference) or Subway! And that is a fact!

Last week was freaking awful... Here is the deal - I did really good during the day, then night time came and BOOM! I was having an out of body experience! And I can't even begin to tell you how many calories I may have consumed. I weighed 328 this morning. I am disgusted with myself. I guess the best way is to starve myself, because obviously I have no self control. I may write more later and further explain myself - but for the time being I ate too much last week, I did not work out, I am slowly killing myself for some reason, and I don't know how to stop. Well that is all a little too dramatic. I just ate because it tastes good and I like it - period. But I also like to feel better and I like it when my clothes fit, so I am going to push myself again this week! I am going to start fresh! By God I need some help, because obviously I keep falling backwards.

Good morning all -

I weighed 323 this morning - Not good, but last monday 4/11/11 I weighed 327.8 - So I did pretty well last week! But wow, it sure is easy to get off track and WAY hard to get back on. My lunch is packed, we have put p90X & walking BACK into the schedule, we have tons of the RIGHT kind of food in the house for dinners this week, and we have a goal again! I do MUCH better when there is a goal in sight! Beach in September! 5 months to get something going! If I could just lose 10 lbs a month then I would be a svelt 275 by beach time! Still not to my elusive 250 mark - WHICH I AM STILL PLANNING ON HITTING BY THE END OF THIS YEAR!!!!! But I think 275 is a respectable and attainable goal. I am currently munching on a few almonds, I had a cereal bar for breakfast - I LOVE the Fiber One bars, but I am having to cut back... WAY too much gas... And there is not an easy way for me to expel that at work so my gut gets all jacked up. I will reserve the Fiber One's for afternoon snacks, sorry kelly sue.... - I have a can of soup, green beans & carrots, and some pretzel chips for lunch! I am thinking some whole wheat pasta with a little ground sausage and light red sauce for dinner. I have to go be looking good for the beach! And KSTS is in a wedding in October to I have got to look good for her then - I will see all her old peeps and I have to impress them! Maybe a new James Bond type suit for the occasion! Friday night I am taking KSTS out for a nice dinner at a restaurant I can't mention here cause I don't want her to know - she likes surprises! In a couple weeks we are going to have a garage sale and sometime we are going camping too! And fishing! I miss fishing and want to go fishing! I am going to get back on track and truly work hard - no more milk shakes or ice creams - no more cookies (at least not for a while) - no more burgers - I feel so heavy and sluggish and sloth like. Just a few weeks ago I was feeling so springy and light on my feet... It is SOOO easy to get derailed, but I am kicking it back into gear! My jeans got tight and we donated all my fat jeans so I better kick it! I wish everyone the best of luck with this battle we all seem to face from time to time. It really sucks and believe me - I am with you! I know how hard it is. But please try! The only people who read this are close to me so please do what needs to be done. Do it for me so I can be inspired by you and then I will try my best to inspire you. I want everyone around me to live long happy lives - I know that cake and pizza bring happiness, but it is only short term. Then the next day when you want to take a walk with your kids or you have to walk up stairs at work or you have to do anything you feel like bootie. If you weigh less then you will feel like less bootie - guaranteed! I wish everyone luck in their "journey" - what an awful word for weight loss, but it is what the silly people on the biggest loser call it... Well I am not on a journey - i am on a quest! Thy shall be done, we leave at first light!