I am a fat bastard.... This weekend was not good for me... You know here is what really pisses me off! We literally walked over four miles this weekend - and I mean it is unreal how hot it was! I would not be surprised if we walked closer to 7 miles in total... but it was hot and I freaking weighed in this morning and I am a big 335! THAT IS 5 LBS UP FROM LAST WEEK! Now I was bad this weekend, but not that bad! Plus all the walking had to do some good.... Dang I am aggravated today... Okay!

SO! I am starting fresh once again. I have four months to be 290. I know I can do it and I WILL do it! I packed breakfast and lunch - 1030 in calories. Dinner will be subway and I am going to look up a low cal dinner for tomorrow and I am cooking! I am really frustrated and need to get a hold of this aggravation and kick some weight ass! KSTS is mowing for us right now so to the gym this evening - cardio - at least 60 mins, but I am thinking maybe an hour and 15 right now! I am so mad at myself and just don't understand my body.

Good morning my peoples! Okay yesterday was not the best... It wasn't bad either, but not the best... Lunch was not too bad - small piece of grilled chicken and some okra and a few fries - but believe me - it was TINY! And not that good so I didn't even eat it all! Which as all of you know is highly unlike me! Then dinner last night we went to this cafeteria. I had country style steak with gravy, mashed taters, corn, bread, mac & cheese, little piece of cake... Okay so it was a lot of food - or it sounds like a lot of food - but it really wasn't all that big of portions. So yesterday I was a little naughty... oh well... I only had 240 for breakfast this am - not sure about lunch yet. I have an estimate @ 1:00 so my boss man wants to grab lunch before that I am sure. But I will be good! And tonight I have some chicken strips marinating in the fridge so I will cook them up and make a little brown rice and eat good for dinner! NO WORRIES! The pathway to Dead Sexiness is still a go!

Well! We did not go to panera bread last night, but I was still pretty good! After mowing and visiting for a bit we ate at Hickory Tavern. I was tempted by steak sandwiches and fries and good hearty things! BUT! I opted for two grilled chicken tacos (which were good, but mostly lettuce and salsa), side of steamed veggies (zuccini, squash, & carrots), and a small dinner salad. I did top all that off with one blue moon beer... But all in all my dinner last night was less than 1000 calories! So my grand total yesterday was just a shade over 2000, not too bad!

Today I have had 280 for breakfast and not sure about lunch yet. I was going to eat out with a client, but plans changed so I will have to do something else. I have a bag of popcorn which I believe has 500 - 600 calories or I can go grab a subway or salad somewhere. Not sure what the plan is yet! But I will be good! Tonight we are going to the gym to work out! I am ready for it! I can honestly say that with just two days of eating better I feel much less bloated and better already. I know I will be sore tomorrow, but I am so ready to be slim and dead sexy!

Okay - One day down! Yesterday had whole wheat pasta, ground turkey, and red sauce! Dinner was around 1000 calories so that puts be right around 2000 for the day. KSTS had an awful headache last night so we didn't get to go to the gym, but we walked the dogs for a good long time late in the evening after the sun had gone down. It was very pleasant last night and again today for that matter!

For breakfast I had 260 cals - yogurt and granola bar! Now I am eating a bologna wrap and stuff. When I get home my calories will be around 900. This evening I am going to mow my father-in-laws yard and we will eat with him - probably panera bread. So that will be my healthy dinner and exercise. I am going to try and do my internet job when I get home before I go mow, so maybe we will go for a walk again tonight!

Let me see... I have 129 days to lose the 40ish lbs I want to drop. So that means I need to lose .3lbs a day! I CAN DO IT!

Good morning all my loyal fans! So... It has been a rough going for a while. Off the diet band wagon and in a dark place. Lots has happened. Anyone reading this knows that so no need to dive back into the past couple months. As of today and am starting over on the pathway to dead sexiness! My lunch is packed and by the time I get home I should only be about 900 calories into the day! That will leave plenty for dinner tonight - which I am thinking is going to be whole wheat pasta, some red sauce, and a grilled turkey burger patty! KSTS and I WILL be going to the gym tonight to get in gear.

I will be honest. At first laying off working out and eating good was great! But lately (like the last 2 weeks) I have been feeling like ass! And I think it is from the bad food and lack of exercise. My body feels sluggish, bloated, and stiff. I have been getting headaches and just not doing great. I know some people just hate to work out - I am lucky in the fact that I kind of enjoy it once I am there in the act. Its getting the motivation to go and do it that I am lacking... I am going to try and do better!

So lets get to the bad right quick. I was down to the fifth notch on my belt, I have slipped back to the fourth... I was down to 314 at the lowest, now I am around 330... My arms feel weak, my gut feels huge - I am not in a good place... But all that will change!

I will do my best to keep this updated on an almost daily basis! I can't make any promises. I spend 6 hours most days on the computer at work, then I go home and try to spend another 2 on the internet doing a side job. So there are times when being on the computer is the LAST thing I want to do. But I will do my best to keep everyone updated! All 2 of you...

SO.... Here is the new plan. KSTS and I are planning on making another Florida run around the first of the year. Maybe for New Years - I want to be below 300, really I want to be 290. That gives me four months to lose 40 pounds. That is only 10 a month, 2.5 a week! If I can't do this then I just suck! I need help and motivation! So if anyone wants to post things on here for inspiration or tell me in person how dead sexy I am or cook healthy meals for me or even join in my weight loss extravaganza! (DAD!) Then all those things will help on my pathway...